Last post I explained that this abuse was not just an occasional thing and it went on much longer than just a couple months. The abuse started when I was 19yrs old and after a year or so I was to the point where I was maybe sleeping 3hrs a night. I was having night terrors constantly, could barely eat, I was dropping weight quickly. I was given different herbs to help me sleep and nothing really helped. Kevin kept doing my “counseling” and on occasion Teri would join in and talk about my dreams and how they weren’t dreams, they were repressed memories. They would also use this time to talk about how horrible my parents were and how dare they miss this.

I had mentioned it was so hard because I felt like the nightmares were nonstop and I couldn’t make them stop. Kevin suggested that I write out my nightmares, write them out in great detail so I could just get them “out” of my head. So I did on a few occasions. The first time I did so, I remember it like it was yesterday. I was so embarrassed and it was terrifying to write it all out but I wanted them to stop so I did it. I sent it to Kevin and Teri as instructed. In this dream a man took me into his bedroom and forced me to perform oral sex on him until he finished and then he did all kinds of different things to me.

I don’t remember if it was that night or the next but it was very shortly after I gave them the letter. Teri went out of town and took Stephen and a little kid or two. That night Kevin did what he always did and texted me asking if I was having trouble sleeping, which I never slept. So of course I told him I wasn’t asleep and he told me if I wanted to come upstairs he would try and help me relax and that he was already in the kitchen (which was right by the basement stairs). I came upstairs because I knew he wanted me to. Then he started groping me, running his hands all over my body panting, grinding his hips on me and kissing me. Then he told me to come with him. He took me down the hall and into his bedroom. I was terrified of this room, if Teri was gone there was no one that could possibly come in here, there would be no question as to why the door was locked, no one would come looking for me in here and I could be stuck in here for hours. Then Kevin started enacting my nightmare on me, literally word for freaking word how I described it in my letter. After I finished giving him oral, he was sitting on the edge of the bed and I was on my knees in front of him. He tilted my head up with my chin telling me once again that I had definitely done that before because I was just so good at it. Then he went on to act out the rest of my dream on me. This was also not just a one time occurrence.

Something else that happened repeatedly, Kevin would often tell me he was going to up for a while or text me late at night asking if I needed something to help me sleep. He would have me meet him upstairs. Sometimes even with others around it would be mentioned that I hadn’t slept much. Kevin went to his bedroom and came back into the kitchen and handed me a pill from his pocket telling me it was a muscle relaxer. He would then pour me typically a couple shots worth of whiskey or rum and tell me to down that with the pill. Now I have to say, this started before I was 21yrs old. And I am an absolute lightweight when it comes to any kind of medication. I have chronic back issues and I HATE taking anything for it because even the most mild muscle relaxers knock me out for 12+ hrs.
So within 15-20 minutes of the combo of hard liquor and prescription drugs, I typically couldn’t so much as walk straight. Kevin would end up walking me downstairs to my room because I was too dizzy to safely make it downstairs. Once in the basement and in the far corner where my bedroom was he would start kissing me, groping me, and he would assault me once again.

These were not rare occasions and this was not just a man who was overwhelmed with a woman’s beauty and accidentally felt her up like some would like you to believe. This is a man who intentionally manipulated and terrorized his victim for his enjoyment for years! Making her worst nightmares and more, a reality.

Click here to read the next post Final Physical Boundary